This poem begins at the end of all life.

It starts with full stops and has no commas.

It starts with the sound of tepid stagnant water;

With silence and stillness.

 

This poem should begin with everything that love and life should be.

Rainbows. Laughter. Songs. Pictures. Hugs. Smiles. Joy.

 

But this poem leaves me stranded.

Its first scene opens up to me gazing at the epitaph of my father.

 

This is how I begin poems on days when god becomes a metaphor for frustration.

This is how I tell my hands to write words that my tongue fears to speak.

This is how my poem begins on days when my eyes cannot find the sun.

 

On those days my grief smells on these sheets

And my poems have the colour of pain.

When read they leave a sour but burning taste of fear

 

On those days I want to die with the sun.

Hide myself in the garment of the night’s darkness.

I want to be nestled in the thick arms of my grief.

 

But on those days the sun shines and refuses to leave the clouds.

Spewing warmth from the hollow of her mouth

And for a while, I forget my darkness.

 

____

Edaki Timothy is a student of the University of Benin who loves dreaming of girls he may never have. Find him tweeting crazy thoughts @EdakiTimothy.

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